


Softly, As I Leave You

by angelus2hot



Category: P.S. I Love You (2007)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Community: smallfandomfest, F/M, Het
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-14
Updated: 2013-01-14
Packaged: 2017-11-25 10:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/638141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelus2hot/pseuds/angelus2hot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the end for Gerry and Holly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Softly, As I Leave You

**Author's Note:**

> **Title:** Softly, As I Leave You  
>  **Fandom:** P.S. I Love You  
>  **Characters/Pairing:** Gerry/Holly  
>  **Rating:** PG-13(character death)  
>  **Word Count:** 1,049  
>  **Summary:** It's the end for Gerry and Holly.  
>  **A/N:** written for [Smallfandomfest](http://smallfandomfest.livejournal.com/profile) fest 12

She kicked the door shut with her the heel of her shoe as she entered the apartment. “Gerry, Where are you?” She placed the bags onto the counter in the small kitchen as she looked for her husband. He had only gone to the doctor because of the headaches he had been having. But surely, he should have been back hours ago. _What was taking him so long?_

Suddenly, a noise made her turn her head. Her husband stood in the doorway the look on his face was unlike anything she had ever seen. She knew the news couldn’t be good. “What did the doctor say?

“Sorry, I’m late, Holly.” He flashed her a grin. “But you know how doctors are... they want to check for every little thing. And everyone knows it’s all about the money. The more they poke and prod the more money they make.”

Holly smiled, she couldn’t help it. But she wasn’t to be avoided. She knew when her husband was keeping something from her. She quickly repeated her question. “What did he say, Gerry?

“It’s nothing, Holly.”

“Gerry.” Just his name said in that tone. The one she used when he was in serious trouble.

“Ah, Holly. Can’t you just let it go?”

“No, I can’t. This is you we’re talking about.”

“I know, Holly. But I’m fine.” He desperately wanted to believe the words he was saying.

“Please, Gerry. Just tell me what he said.”

A huge sigh escaped him. “The doctor doesn’t know anything yet. He had some tests done, blood samples, cat scans... that sort of thing. He said he would call as soon as the results were in.”

“That doesn’t sound....”

She squealed, her words were cut off as Gerry suddenly lifted her up in his arms and carried her into the bedroom.

“What are you doing?”

He laid her gently on the bed before he stood up and began to remove his clothes. “What does it look like I’m doing?” He unzipped his jeans and let them fall to the floor. “I’m going to make love to my wife in the middle of the afternoon.” Gerry paused for a second. “If it’s perfectly okay with you.”

Despite being worried, Holly could no more deny him than she could herself. With a smile on her face she patted the space beside her.

 

 

It seemed like months later, but was really only days, the call finally came. Before she could reach the phone, Gerry snatched it up and left the room. 

Holly impatiently walked the floor as she waited for her husband to tell her what the tests had revealed. This was the hardest thing she had ever gone through. Lines of worry etched her forehead as she rung her hands.

“You’re going to walk a hole clean through the floor if you keep that up, darlin’.” Gerry teased as he walked into the room and sat on the edge of the bed.

“What did he say?”

“I don’t want you to worry...”

 _It was bad. She knew it!_ She quickly interrupted. “Why does everyone always say that? Just tell me, Gerry. Please.”

He didn’t know how to say it. How was he supposed to tell the love of his life that he was dying?

Holly stopped pacing and kneeled at his feet. “Gerry?”

“I have tumor, Holly. That’s what’s been causing the headaches.”

With those words her world crashed at her feet. There was nothing that anyone could say that would bring it back. Suddenly, she raised her head and stared into his eyes. “There’s got to be something we can.” She ignored the negative shake of his head. She didn’t want to think about losing him. “We will find a way.” She put her hands on his cheeks. “No matter what. We will fight this. Do you hear me?”

Slowly, Gerry nodded his head. “We’ll fight.” What else could he say? He didn’t want to have to admit to his wife that no matter what they did there was no hope of survival. 

 

Days slid into weeks until months had passed by. The disease took its toll on Gerry a little at a time until he was bedridden.

Holly spent every moment she could with Gerry, she would sit by his bed and they would talk about the way they had met in Ireland, the things they had done, and the things they had yet to do.

One night, close to three in the morning, her eyes red from tears she tried not to shed and lack of sleep Holly turned to look at Gerry. “Please, Gerry. Don’t leave me. How am I supposed to go on without you?”

Gerry feigned sleep not because he couldn’t answer but because he couldn’t face her tears. _What was he supposed to say, what could he say when she begged him to stay?_

He kept his eyes closed tight and his breathing even until finally Holly lay down beside him and fell asleep.

 

All of sudden he knew the end was near, he could feel himself beginning to slip away. Thankfully, he had already made all of the arrangements for himself and for Holly. Hopefully, the things he had put in place would help Holly adjust to her new life without him. He just had one more thing he had to do. He couldn’t leave without answering her question. 

Gerry quickly reached for the notepad lying on the table by the bed.

 

_Dear Holly,  
I didn’t want to leave without answering your question. And I’m sorry, I didn’t answer you when you asked me earlier. I would give anything to be able to promise you that I won’t leave you but we both know I can’t stay. So, instead of just facing you, I pretended to be asleep because even after all the years we’ve spent together I still can’t bear to see your tears. _

_I know this hard for you, my love. But you have to let me go._

_Just know that wherever I am, I’m loving you and missing you._

_So, live, Holly. Live for the both of us._

_I will always love you,  
Gerry_

 

Gerry folded the letter and gently placed it in Holly’s hand before he laid his hand on top of hers and within a few moments he had breathed his last.


End file.
